Spicaresque:

A Spanglish blog dedicated to the works, ruminations, and mongrel pyrotechnics of Yago S. Cura, an Argentine-American poet, translator, publisher & futbol cretin. Yago publishes Hinchas de Poesia, an online literary journal, & is the sole proprietor of Hinchas Press.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

EFRAIN FERNANDEZ COMES CLEAN ABOUT THE ILLICIT SPHERES THAT REVOLVE HIS EX-WIFE, MILAYDIS


I want you to understand that what I am about to tell you I do so at great peril to me and my three sons. And that if you repeat any of this and como consequencia my family is put in danger, I will not think twice about telling very bad people who else knows about their secret. And they will come looking for you as well.

La familia de mi ex-wife Milaydis' es candela, that is, they sell drugs, all of them: la abuela, Lesbia, Milaydis, my ex-wife, and her sister, Rafelina. And they prostitute their bodies, sometimes in alleys, y when they pueden adentro del apartamento. And they have all been pinched at some point in time by la policia.

La abuela, Lesbia, was even deported back to D.R. in 2003 after a Distribution conviction, but she managed to slither back in to the country a year later by using a dead relative's birth certificate and her hypnotizante grey eyes.

They sell drogas with my children in the house and they tell the children that they are selling sugar but children are not stupid y ellos pueden intuir ciertas cosas like when adults are not being completely truthful.

And where there is drogas there are men with guns, sitting around, helping them cut it and usually they sleep with the women that are selling the merch; you can't lie to me because even though I managed to stay clear of perico, I grew up around it on the Bergenline and Union City: I know how they have to do to do what they do with what they have.

Kelvin is almost nine years old and his hermanito, Andrew, is three. Miguel is actually Milaydis' kid but I have been criando him ever since he was 18 months old and I consider him my son even though biological thass not the case. These are my three kids and if you are their lawyer then you have to do whateber possible to make sure that you get them out of that house because no hay nada bueno en esa casa except la mala influencia.

It wasn't like that in Providence a donde vivimos por casi cinco anos. All the time we were there we were a nice family. I supported us because I have always been an entrepreneur, so I opened a driving school and a cash checking place, and even though we weren't rich we lived well and were able to save enough money to live in D.R. for year and buy another little tereno close to Punta Cana where we could build some bungalows and open a little hotel.

But now, none of that. If Milaydis is going to keep this up and keep prostituting her body and being a fucking vacuum cleaner of cocaine, then I don't want none of that. Mira, you can investigate my family. I have a tia by Kingsbridge that has a child care license and one in Pelham that is a third grade teacher so you know that I will be able to take care of my sons and give them the supplies they need for school or baseball and provide the influence their life is currently missing.

Mira, I was born in this country and so was everyone in my family, but Miladys' family was not; they are all interlopers who were born in the Republica. And if the judge asked Miladys to produce one family member to speak on her behalf (just one) none of her relatives would come because they are all sought by the police. La policia is looking for all of them or has arrested and convicted every single one of them; they all have records for selling or possessing, and I recently heard that Miladys has to actually piss in a cup because someone called Adult and Child Services on the apartment del demonio.

It seems Miladys, Rafelina, and the mother, Lesbia, were going out on Friday and Saturday nights, staying out all night, and leaving Kelvin in charge. Except, Kelvin is just nine years old, and it is against the law to leave a nine year old in charge of the other children. And they know this and they do it anyways which is the definition of low-class people, and we are not low-class people.

All these years I succeeded in keeping Miladys away from her family y para que. The first opportunity she has to go back to that rogue's gallery and she trots right on over and forgets everything that we have built together in Providence. I should have known that you can not take a low-class peon from the sticks in D.R. and turn her into J-Lo. No, she may fool you for a while, become facsimile of a person that you thought you were with. But, the first chance she has of dragging her pussygato all over the barrio and doing Lord knows what is the first chance that she will take to prostitute her body and do those hoochie things that she has pent up in her, waiting to get out.

Yo pense that I could take the hoochie out of Miladys, but there is no helping that. Yo escuche somewheres that the Lord takes care of the fools and the babys. I guess because they are the most helpless they need the most help, but there is also great abuso or abuse that can come from the helpless. And that is when they revert to that hoochiness that they carry inside, that hoochiness they can't shake. And that is when it all goes to hell, when the helpless begin to pull the strings and mouth the words that shouldn't be formed. When the helpless pull the rest of us down into the trench that they can't seem but to occupy, look into the skies and wait for the pillars of fire and the doves of despair.

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